Tag: capitalism

Black Lives Matter Is A Hate Group, Happy Black Friday

~ DonKaftan ~ 3 Comments

Written By Dr. Seabass T. Gorka, Ph.D., Esq

First, I would like to say happy Black Friday from Bullshit News! May your sweet deals ever benefit my continually growing stock portfolio. Second, Black Lives Matter is a hate group. They dislike capitalism, liberty, and freedom equally. They are anti-American by definition and must be stopped by any means necessary. Their radical agenda reflects those of the ruthless Black Panthers and the Civil Rights Bad Guys from the ’50s and ’60s. It is an ideology based on Black Supremacy, a hatred rooted deeply from a similar form of Godless Islamic Barbaric extremism. The Black Lives Matter militia has conquered southern Detroit and yet the Hussein Obama administration has done nothing to address this! They harbor terrorism consciousness and want to make the American economy rupture into nothingness. They plan to accomplish this with a “National Black Friday Boycott”, to attack capitalism at its source: the American Heartland.

The Black Lives Matter militia want the United States of America to become the “United States of Africa”, by claiming that America is a country based on “stolen land”. That is patently false, the earliest Americans were explorers looking to go westward to claim the continent as God intended. Any interaction with the mythos of “Native Americans” was done appropriately, by bartering goods/food for land. The Black Lives Matter crowd has evidently never read a history textbook, which would refute all of their ludicrous claims. Even the early settlers in American history were African-American in origin when they went off to Oregon and California for manifest destiny. The Black Lives Matter believe in a warped sense of history, believing that average every day Americans have “oppressed” them for far too long, hence their desire to take extremist action.

For liberals that are attempting to analyze my irrefutable logic, the Black Lives Matter militia do not want you to save money by shopping today. They want you to boycott the holiday because it “oppresses black lives around the world”. Listening to them is a form of appeasement, a logic tactic no different from England being okay with Nazi Germany invading Poland and France. First Black Lives Matter will issue an order, then they will make their demands louder and bolder until they get what they want. This is a common element of extremist movements: constantly begging to get what they want or they will issue violence. Ignoring these kinds of statements will lead to more deaths by angry leftists that refuse to work. South Detroit and Kaepernick were only the beginning of Black Lives Matter’s conquest for Black Supremacy.

Finally, Bullshit News would like to thank everyone that participates in “Black Friday” today. This is one of the more important days in American history that move the Economy ball rolling. Keep spending fellow Bullshiteers, capitalism can only work when we all work for it. Don’t listen to the Black Lives Matter lies about not purchasing greatly discounted goods in order to appease their movement, spend as much as you can today! The more powerful the U.S. economy is, the less powerful hateful extremist groups like Black Lives Matter become. The free market will always win, a black hand is not an invisible hand. It would be clearly visible.

 

Dr. Seabass T. Gorka, Esq is the Bullshit News correspondent for black supremacy extremist groups. He has had a storied career reporting on European Affairs from Hungary and is the number one expert on extremism across the globe. Bullshit News is excited for his well-endowed knowledge on extremism, and its relation to liberalism. He earned his Ph.D. in Prague and became a lawyer in America. He is a naturalized citizen of the United States and resides in Houston. 

We Need To Go Back To Vietnam And End Communism Once And For All

~ DonKaftan ~ 1 Comment

Written by Sgt. Louie Gates II

It has been 43 years since the Vietnam War ended, with America receiving a bitter win compared to a perfect or flawless win, of course, I’m talking about the Revolutionary War and the Iraq War respectively. Unlike most of our victories in wars, the communist Vietnamese and their evil twin the Vietcong are both still very powerful political blocs in Vietnam, with seemingly no room for freedom or capitalism to flourish in the region. China understood capitalism is essential, so they adapted to modern day economics. The same for Laos and Cambodia, but yet Vietnam still remains a communist shithole incapable of progressing in the right direction on planet Earth. So what gives?

For those young Republicans (we see you Turning Point USA!) that might not remember the Vietnam War, it took place under the cold war as a battle of ideologies. The evil communist USSR was desperate to expand communism wherever necessary. Those actions lead them to conquer half of Europe and random territories throughout the world like Cuba, Afghanistan, and of course Vietnam. Their efforts were limited and stifled by our protagonist capitalists, the United States of America. Vietnam was the battleground where capitalism and communism would duke it out for absolute supremacy. This is where the ‘bitter” win comes in, America won the war, and ultimately the Cold War, but Vietnam resisted capitalism enough that the war became too unpopular in America (a tragedy in its own right) so that Jimmy Carter and his hippie squad of solar panels took American forces out of Vietnam.

As we learned, intervening in other countries affairs does great wonders for limiting evil ideologies from maintaining any more power and control across the world. Vietnam might not have wanted to fight on their own soil, but it was necessary in order to curb the evils of total communism from growing any further. Communism since the Vietnam War has been limited to a couple of square miles on Earth, but the number of square miles communism should be practiced on Earth should be 0. And because we’re not at 0 yet, Vietnam must pay the ultimate price, again. They can make the switch very easily at any time over the past 43 years but have refused to do so. Their political negligence cannot be ignored any further and action must take place. I’m sure many Americans can understand the need to purge communism off the globe, we don’t live in the 1970’s any more to find such ideas intolerable.

The evil scourge of communism must be eradicated no matter how impossible the odds may seem. Communism is an inherent evil towards our society. Communism and capitalism are incompatible with each other as capitalism seeks for people to work for what they want, free from government control and tyranny while communism suggests that people should depend on their government for absolutely everything. It’s no surprise to see the Democratic Party endorse communist countries and behaviors, like Venezuela, Cuba or Nicaraguan death squads. They are very desperate for any kind of voter help no matter how illegal or improbable it is for citizens in these countries to vote for them illegally. The Democratic Party remains the only monolith obstacle remaining to stop America from re-intervening in Vietnam and ending communism there once and for all. Should Republicans re-win the midterms, intervening in Vietnam should be priority #1, as the Supreme Court is perfectly filled for now.

But even winning the midterms might not be enough to win the war before it even starts. We’ll need as much manpower as we get, so it is important to reinstate the draft to help two fronts. The first front would be crushing communism in Vietnam. The second front will allow these illegal immigrants, refugees, and other wannabe Americans to join our army, and consequently our country, as long as they move to the front lines and fight the evil communist scourge of Vietnam head-on. If they really love our country, they need to be the first battalion out and collect some scalps for proof. Its how many other red white and blue-blooded Americans earned their citizenships before, and like any American tradition, it ought to continue. Collecting scalps is the only way to know if these illegal refugees and Mexicans really love our country enough to kill the evil communist bastards that oppose it.

Remember that communism is terrorism’s older brother. They go hand in hand like a hot dog and a bun. They need each other to survive and thrive. The only way to cleanse ourself of this evil and impure ideology is to destroy it at its source. Vietnam is one of the sources as well as Venezuela. While Venezuela crushes under its own weight, Vietnam remains relatively aloof. The time has come for the Vietcong to Vietchoke.

 

Sgt. Louie Gates II is Bullshit News’ correspondent on national security and military issues. He owns five Rottweilers and is a huge Boston Red Sox fan. He is faithful to his wife LaShawnda Gates and has two daughters. He served in the military many times on multiple tours and received a purple heart for his valiant efforts to protect our country.

Bitcoin: The Currency Of Communism

~ DonKaftan ~ 5 Comments

Written by Gilbert Miser

The internet has been such an incredible new tool for the entire American planet over the last eight years or so. However with such great technology, there come nefarious uses to utilize the “internet” or a “computer”, such as the malicious use of going to liberal news sites like CNN or any other website that isn’t Bullshit News. Unfortunately, the communists have infiltrated the Internet attempting to overthrow the United States government and its people. The communists, ironically, decided to create their own currency to rival the absolute and powerful American Dollar with Bitcoin.

What is a Bitcoin? I can only tell you what it is not. Bitcoin is not a tangible physical object that tells you its worth on paper or a real coin. A bitcoin only exists online as a number, and nothing but. No one knows who invented the elusive bitcoin, but the communists, libertarians, and slowly the liberals are all on the bitcoin hype train, taking it as a serious currency to rival the almighty Dollar. What we’re seeing here boys and girls is how fascism tries to overthrow a state. They don’t start by trying to initiate and spreading false promises about how bad the government is, they silently attempt to overthrow America with subtle actions. It doesn’t matter how bitcoin works, it matters on how it’s trying to destroy or defame America.

Communists have always sought the destruction of America and the deaths of all the women too. It is a disease on the world that is set out to take away the hardest working members of society: the rich. Without the rich, where will the wondrous innovations of capitalism come from? It won’t happen in Silicon Valley anymore if you take away the American Dollar. Communism knows that it can’t function 100% from the writings of Karl Marx from far too long ago. Communism needs aspects of capitalism for it to function, such as the revolutionary idea known as currency. The mysterious communist inventors of the bitcoin knew they could not make money in America, and decided to invent a clever ponzi scheme they can program and scam millions of Americans while indoctrinating those scammed into a belief that a socialist society could work, and even be feasible.

Whenever a communist explains how bitcoin works, they will bring up the term “blockchain”. Then, they will do it again and again until they hit you in the head with a hammer and sickle and take your money. There is no blockchain, it is merely a buzzword used by bitcoin advocates to persuade you to the idea that bitcoin has a reason to work. It doesn’t. Bitcoin is not real, it is merely a bunch of numbers decided by a handful of communists that deem your worthiness in society. Now tell me, is that liberty? Is that true economic freedom? It is a substitute, a failure to model and rival the powerful American Dollar and by extension, challenging American sovereignty at home and across the globe. Bitcoin might be one of the greatest evils against the United States since the beginning of the War on Terror.

Despite all of this, the American Dollar is still as powerful as it always has. Bitcoin might be just dust blowing in the wind, but it can also try to cripple the Trump Administration. Any communist invention needs to be intensely scrutinized to make sure they don’t seriously challenge American Democracy. There is a strong reason why the creators of bitcoin don’t reveal themselves, they will all be sent straight to prison if their true identities were revealed. So Bullshit News is offering a service: give us the identities of the bitcoin manufacturers and we will do the most just thing and forward that information to the FBI CIA or NSA so that we can live in a truly free world without the threat of communism spreading ever again.

Gilbert Miser is the Bullshit News financial and economics correspondent. His billionaire parents both died under mysterious circumstances when he was two. As the only child, he inherited all of their wealth and became the youngest multi-billionaire in the whole world. He was formerly a major broker with Lehman Brothers and MF Broker before retiring from the banking industry to become a part-time writer for Bullshit News. He owns a Yorkie named “Gunner”.

Labor Unions Are The Gateway Drug To Communism

~ DonKaftan ~ 1 Comment

Written by Gilbert Miser

It should come as no surprise that communism and its ugly stepcousin socialism are one of the main pillars of the Democratic Party. But there are other, equally horrible political ideas and factions that form America’s second most popular political party. Among them are the abortion-endorsers, Mexicans, and labor unions. Labor unions are the idea that the workers should form a bund together. What is a bund? Well, talking more about definitions of new foreign-sounding words is how you fall down the Marxist foxhole and get you suckered into communism. And any kind of union-related activity will “fix you” into becoming a communist, and ergo, an unemployed homeless bum. It will be impossible to find a job when you have to roam from train to train to find areas you are not blacklisted in for believing in an abhorrent anti-American terrorist ideology.

Unions allow a minority of workers to have a bigger say in their employment status over the majority. Workers deserve the right to speak for themselves, like individuals in America are normally treated, and without needing a group or organization to do just that. So unions have no use but for workers to tax themselves more for the idea of hosting “pizza party” meetings that conclude with no business done and a total loss for the company. Workers in union-less America are the silent majority of their own workplace, everyone agrees to the rules they are dealt with. If they ask questions, they will know how to raise their hands. So for what purpose do unions really have aside from the obstruction of capitalist justice?

The beauty of America is that the individual is powerful. Communism is the very definition of undoing that powerful feeling which makes Americans and America so tough. Labor Unions revolve around viewing work through a Marxist lens, and that includes threatening to strike, being allowed to loiter more at work or bargain their salaries. Strikes are extremely anti-American and very pro-French and Pro-Italy. Both of these countries, France and Italy, had fascism installed onto their constitutions and forced labor union policies until America kicked their communist asses out of existence in World War II. Do we really want America to be more like Europe, a continent of failed “oh no let’s do our government all over again since the last time didn’t work” nations? Absolutely not, and labor union activity will lead to a rise of this creeping fascism.

Regulations are the problem that labor unions think are the solution. Regulations, many of which were implanted under the Barack Obama regime, are what kill workers from succeeding more in life. Regulations and unions aren’t some kind of Kevlar that can protect workers from having a better life. It’s the opposite, it will lead to disrupted marriages, unintentional children, and even an early death. Or onset-baldness. And, more often than not, will make you lose your job rather than earn you more money. So there is no point to enabling communism in your workplace, it always backfires. The regulations that are already in workplaces like OSHA, EPA and the AFL-CIO create more systemic problems than solving societal woes. It is a swamp currently being weeded out by President Trump and Scott Pruitt. They are both working hard to remove all unions and regulations from existence so we can live in a cleaner and better world away from a government that governs too much.

Communism has and will never win in America, but the fragile Democratic Party seeks to resurrect its policies and practices to somehow “better enrich American lives”. It is all rhetoric, ideas, and dreams without substance, the American X-factor. Workers function better independently, much like the individual and the government. A team that works sparingly together, is a team well-kept and built strongly. Those are the principles that run America, not Godless Islamic communism. And especially unions.

Gilbert Miser is the Bullshit News financial and economics correspondent. His billionaire parents both died under mysterious circumstances when he was two. As the only child, he inherited all of their wealth and became the youngest multi-billionaire in the whole world. He was formerly a major broker with Lehman Brothers and MF Broker before retiring from the banking industry to become a part-time writer for Bullshit News. He owns a Yorkie named “Gunner”.