Written by Deborah Schlasser
Stupid dumb liberals are at it again! Colin Kaepernick, the famous vegan loser from the
Superbowl annual humongous football championship event from “Queer County” San Francisco 49ers, remains unemployed in his efforts to backup a significantly better quarterback. His contract with the 49ers has now ended, and surprise surprise, no one wants a quarterback whose specialty involves running fast and kneeling to Mohammed for forgiveness. His team went 2-14, only beating the “Los Angeles” (still weird) Rams, purely from his bad quarterback play. The dumb 49ers invested money into Jim Tomsula and Chip Kelly to make Colin Kaepernick a productive quarterback to win the Superbowl football championship game, and they both failed and were fired after one year. Of course, a team from San Francisco, hippie beatnik land, can’t budget their money wisely to even SNIFF the playoffs!! They are paying for their coaches salaries still, and their chance to actually land in the playoffs is a good fortnight or fortyear away. At least they are free with Colin “Quarterback” Kaepernick, who lost a Superbowl premiere football game to Joe Flacco, for goodness sake. Maybe if he were a fullback he could find a job, but his career might be put to a close this off-season as owners in the NFL agree: Colin Kaepernick has no football skills and will only be a liberal shill to their team’s locker room. No one wants that.
So liberals that can’t afford rent in the San Francisco Bay Area joining Colin Kaepernick’s efforts to be a quarterback in the league by quitting their own jobs to give Kaepernick, a millionaire who throws his money into the Black Panthers, whatever Boko Haram is, and the infamous militia, Black Lives Matter. These liberals hate America as they too refuse to rise and stand up for our National Anthem, a prayer blessed to us from God. They refuse to be productive units for our strong economy and now will join the failed slumdog quarterback millionaire Kaepernick by joining him and becoming unemployed. This movement reportedly started in Berkeley, is reported to have found “at least” 6,000 active participants to join them. We must force these liberals to serve our fries to us as WE in the participating economy, demand them too! They are whining their ways to profit from our dumb unemployment welfare system, we cannot allow them to do this! We must evict their apartments and studios because we know they cannot afford where they live without a job in the Bay Area! These wastes of tax paying dollars need to not show empathy to a terrible quarterback, but to be productive workers of America by paying taxes and HAVING A JOB!
Deborah Schlasser is the Bullshit News sports tabloid correspondent. She follows the Dodgers, Yankees, Cowboys and goes on and off with the Celtics and Lakers. She loves to win, having played in the NCAA Women’s Elite Eight with Stanford. Her second favorite hobby is licking liberals’ tears.
Editor’s Note: NFL, this is a non-profit entity. Don’t sue us for referencing your unemployed athlete or championship game that produces significant ratings/shares to our great economy.