Update: Christmas Is Saved From Atheist And Islamic Terrorism

Written By Dr. Seabass T. Gorka, Esq

On Christmas Eve we, unfortunately, had to inform our viewers that the Nation of Islam, in cohorts with the Atheist movement/militia, were attempting to sabotage one, if not THE most important holiday in our country/culture, Christmas. They were upset that Christianity is more prominent in the world than their own ideology, festered in hate by one of the devils incarnate in Louie Farrakhan. Farrakhan, for those that do not remember, is one of the biggest “haters” of the 20th and 21st centuries. He is a black supremacy extremist that has expressed an unwavering desire to end “whitey” and some Jewish people that stand in his way. Farrakhan knew he needed an army of people, not just relying on his Nation of Islam, he needed a much larger following to execute his evil demands. Lucky for Farrakhan, he got his Christmas gift early with a large coalition of Atheists that wanted to help him with his desire to end Christmas once and for all with domestic terrorism.

Farrakhan and his Godless Islamic Barbarian and Atheist followers were to go to as many houses in America and try to burn down their Christmas trees and presents and sell the most valuable presents to pawn shops across America to rake in more money for the Nation of Islam. Thankfully, since we alerted the authorities and properly informed the people about this upcoming potential monstrosity, we were able to arrest the many people that attempted to destroy America’s precious holiday that all of us Christians celebrate merrily. That’s right readers of Bullshit News, together we have saved Christmas!

But we must also strive and make efforts to prevent efforts of Democratic Party-funded styles of terrorism that threaten to destroy our countries’ unity. The Atheism community and the Nation of Islam are forms of protected speech by our First Amendment, and their actions of terror, while heavily documented, are not enough for these groups to be disciplined from our judicial system as they are heavily biased towards liberals. This is one thing  President Donald Trump is working on year-round, eradicating this humungous bias against Christianity that is judicial activism. The Democrats tried to stop Supreme Court Justice Brett Kavanaugh from going on the Supreme Court as well as our friend and sometimes advisor of Bullshit News, Neil Gorsuch. We must spend more effort to stop this Democratic madness, and we must always remain vigilant about it.

As we head towards a new year, decade, and plenty more Christmases to come, we must all be aware of the threat that Louie Farrakhan, the Nation of Islam, and Atheism all have against our country. They are against our values, are for taxes to be raised unfairly for pig barrel spending, and support the Democratic Party more times then they do not. While the Godless Islamic Barbarians and Atheist Coalition may be fundamentally opposed to each other from their respective religious documents, they do align on one goal: the total destruction of Christianity and our beloved United States of America. We must be prepared for Christmas next year, or perhaps Easter as well. We cannot let acts of terrorism define us as a country.

But we don’t need to worry about terrorism anymore today, the Atheist Islamic brutes have lost, and their agenda has been espoused. Other outlets like CNN, The Epoch Times or The Daily Caller would have allowed these acts of terror to slide because of their mainstream liberal biases. But we don’t lie to you, we tell you the truth straight from the source, where all news originates: word of mouth. And despite what those Islamo-Atheist leftist terrorists want, Christmas is here today, and here to stay for the end of time and even beyond that.

God bless you all, and have a merry Christmas and a fruitful new year. Unless you are a radical Atheist-Islamo Barbaric Terrorist, in which case you should go to hell and think about what you were planning on doing.

Dr. Seabass T. Gorka, Esq is the Bullshit News historian and correspondent for black supremacy extremist groups. He has had a storied career reporting on European Affairs from Hungary and is the number one expert on extremism across the globe. Bullshit News is excited for his well-endowed knowledge on extremism, and its relation to liberalism. He earned his Ph.D. in Prague and became a lawyer in America. He is a naturalized citizen of the United States and resides in Houston with his dog, Jefferey.

Atheists And The Nation Of Islam Are Attempting To Stop Christmas From Happening

Written by Rachel Gilfords

The War On Christmas is not stopping any time soon, as long as liberals control a portion of the government they will try to stop us from celebrating America’s most beloved holiday. The Atheists, a religious group that opposes all forms of religion and piety not to be confused with Antifa, have decided to join forces with one of the biggest threats to America from Godless Islamic Barbarian brutalism, the Nation of Islam. For those unaware, the Nation of Islam is led by notorious anti-Christian and even anti-Semitic GodKing named Louis Farrakhan. Farrakhan is one of the biggest enemies of Christendom of the 20th and 21st century, wanting to usher in a new crusade while also hating the Jews as a side-quest. Farrakhan might have realized that his goals for conquesting are not good enough to stop Christmas this year and needed a much larger group to help him on his quest. Luckily for Farrakhan, a large amount of Americans (25%, almost all are sinners) are irreligious, or Atheist per their nomenclature.

The alliance between Islam and Atheism was longly considered a hoax. They appear to be mortal enemies, much like Judaism and all sects of Christianity. The Jewish people did not want to celebrate Christmas so they became Jewish instead, which was only considered okay recently. Atheists, on the other hand, are rude and callous and would firebomb Christmas if terrorists would help them. The Nation of Islam is one of the strongest pillars of Godless Islamic Barbarianism and is sometimes called the “American ISIS” or the “Capitalist Taliban”. Farrakhan, in particular, acts as he looks: a ruthless dictator with no care towards people that aren’t his own. Farrakhan once said he would “eat the Jews” if he could, but it is far from the worst thing about him. Farrakhan has a powerful alliance with the Democratic Party (DNC).

It is not an open secret that the DNC has struggled to exist over the decade. The ideas of the Democratic Party lie in the minority of U.S voters, as time and elections have proved over and over again. They are struggling financially, and one group that has given them money since their inception has been the Nation of Islam. They want to erase everything about Christianity and God from our culture and replace it with Louis Farrakhan statues and poorly drawn cave paintings about hunting “whitey”. But I’m getting ahead of myself here.

Atheism has long been a threat to the America we love and support every day. Atheists have contributed nothing to American culture and have long antagonized it and everything regarding organized religion. Atheism has no organized leader or central planning, similar to communism in ideology. And since the Atheist movement has no leader, they are perhaps a larger threat than the Nation of Islam by themselves if they weren’t so rudderless with their kibbutz-inspired “leadership”. So how do we know the Nation of Islam is now working with the Atheists? Well, the (somewhat open) secret is that they have been working together for decades now, announcing the partnership as public to threaten Christians near one of the holiest days of the year? Farrakhan would do that as a ruthless tyrant who wants to seek control of the White House via illicit means.

“But what about Christmas? What are these groups planning on doing to stop Christmas?” You, the intelligent reader of Bullshit News just had this thought enter your head. Farrakhan and his Nation of Islam with the support of the Atheist Coalition will try to stop Christmas by going from house to house and burning Christmas Trees down without thought or care to the families that are celebrating their time-honored heritage. Although if your children and/or teenagers are smart, they would be properly armed and ready to assault any suspicious-looking person that attempts to walk on your front lawn and try to destroy your holiday spirit.

The Nation of Islam is and has been recruiting the Atheists to undermine America’s first or second most important holiday of the year. Farrakhan is inspired by the Atheist’s commitment to leaderless, organized action. They will attempt to burn down our Christmas trees anywhere across America, so being armed and prepared for tonight is essential. The Atheists and their Nation of Islam cohorts will try to take your presents and sell them to people that don’t deserve it, or probably burn them and be turned on from the pyromania.

Unfortunately, we cannot sleep early tonight as this is a national crisis that these terrorist groups will try to remove the joy from one of the holiest (if not, THE) days of our year. So lock your doors, take your rifles or shotguns out from the cupboard and look out the windows carefully tonight. Because whether you will have rain, sleet, snow, or even hail, the Nation of Islam and Atheists will try to destroy one of our great pillars of our country. We must be prepared for the worst so that we can celebrate Christmas tomorrow when we’re at our best.

If I don’t make it out alive because of the Atheists, I want my last written words to be: Merry Christmas and have a jovial new year. If you don’t hear from me again, you’ll know what happened. Merry CHRISTMAS.

Rachel Gilfords is Bullshit News’ White House Correspondent, On-Field Reporter and a correspondent on religions that are not Christianity-affiliated or Judaism. She has covered the horrific tragedy of 9/11 and was at Ground Zero at 5:45AM, before any other reporter in all news media. Rachel has received acclaimed conservative awards and adoration from Rupert Murdoch. Rachel knows for certain that Bullshit News has a ‘no bullshit policy’ towards sexual harassment.

Religious Liberty Is Precisely The Reason Atheism Makes No Sense

Written by Pastor John Mathewson

Friends, our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ was assassinated for speaking out on his beliefs. The First Commandment, like the First Amendment, is about treating everyone equally with altruism and respect. However, every commandment has exceptions and clauses only the most scholarly priests and pastors know. It’s like being a lawyer but communicating with God and not having to bother dealing with more than one book. The existence of “Atheism”, a virus originating from San Francisco inside a Nancy Pelosi-funded elementary school class, is now more than just a virus: it is a threat to our national security.

Atheism is the denial that God exists with strong condemnation. There is no Atheist book that summarizes their entire ideology so I can do a much better job in one news article than Charles Darwin could ever muster. Denying a God, or being in a Godless state of mind, has much more to do with terrorism than our Creator who enabled us to make differences in life like planting trees or growing tomatoes to sell at above market value. ISIS is a Godless Islamic Terrorist heathen organization that is a haven for Atheism. Atheists do not have a moral compass to know wrong from right, which is very evident in the fact that they do not have a book that highlights their ethical tenets. Prominent Atheists like Christopher Hitchens, Richard Dawkins, and Mahatma Gandhi helped kick-start ISIS in the 1970’s, which is around the time the War on Christmas spearheaded as a Democratic Party collaborative effort to garner more voters. With no regard for a code of morality or standards of ethics, it’s easy to see why Atheists behave they way that they are.

Religious liberty is one of the many variants of liberty, but it is among one of the most important. Believe me. Religious liberty allows persecuted Christians to preach and speak freely without having to die for their beliefs. The same can be said for other religions like Catholicism or Judaism. Atheism is not a religion and does not share the same problems Christianity has. Atheism is a decision, which still is fair under the First Amendment, but like choosing to murder someone, it doesn’t mean that it’s right. The United States of America even gives religious liberty to the Jews as a measure of how non-Christian religious organizations can not worry about dying in the name of some other, foreign God. After all, the United States of America was a country that originated from the tolerance of puritans.

The United States is a country rich with a diversity of faith, but that comes with a set of dangers as well. Dangerous and destructive ideologies like Agnosticism and Atheism let their people live without order and authority, lacking central beliefs with such an Anarchist worldview. This new wave of pernicious rhetoric is becoming more increasingly common with the youth hip rock groups these days like “The Millennials”. These “The Millennials” are also more likely to believe in Satanism and that its tenets are valid. While this could be perceived as a bigger threat than Atheism, the Church of Satan does have a book they base their flawed and fictitious ideology around. It is very telling that Satanists somehow have higher ethical standards and a stronger moral code than what Atheists lack.

Be careful young BullShiteers out there on the college campuses, and watch out for “The Millennials” if they are performing nearby at your local music venue. There could also be Agnostic ISIS Satanist vegans lurking at your nearby workplace employment recreational area, on your lunch break. Or worse, as a neighbor. But remember, if anyone attempts to violate your religious liberties, you can always strike back on Sundays. The Lord awaits.

Pastor John Mathewson is Bullshit News’s go-to Pastor and Religion Correspondent. He accepts people from every denomination and religion into his church, including Agnostics, excluding the Jews. He has a golden retriever he loves and adores named “Johanna”.