Written by Pastor John Mathewson
That damning lie created by hell child Charles Darwin has corrupted our ways of thinking in our God-fearing commie-fighting country. American children are subjected to liberal textbooks and “science classes” designed to promote polytheistic religions like Islam, the Deist dudes, and Catholicism. Quite frankly it is absolutely disgusting and abhorrent. The education system in the United States is a swamp filled with political correctness and proselytizing hedonism that promotes the immoral ways of reproduction. And worst of all, they educate the belief that there may be more than one God.
One of the worst classes our beloved children must attend in secondary school is “Biology”, where they do not learn germ theory, but gender theory. The theory that there are “an endless amount of genders” because evolution claims that we come from monkey clams fishing in the sea! Preposterous! Who could believe this leftist trash? What sort of hippie Gestapo cult lies within the Trump Administration? How can Betsy DeVos allow this kind of “knowledge” to be spread to children who don’t know how to speak formal coherent sentences? And don’t let me begin about what they teach about “sexual reproduction”.
Why must our children be subjected to Catholicism? My female off-spring, Annabelle, goes to our local public school and she told me, “Meep, Alfalfa, and the Holy Ghost”. I nearly had a heart attack. Why does my child know about this polytheistic chant from my public education school? It is a shame that our government cannot be perfect, but we cannot shame Betsy DeVos for inheriting this evil Islam education from the “Barack Hussein Obama” administration that poisoned our White House a decade ago. There is much cleaning and praying to do before our Protestant education system is purified again. Mike Pence needs to have a closer inspection to these schools that teach the damned evolution mythos as a fact. We KNOW Earth is six thousand years old, and our education system refuses to update their eighty-year-old textbooks that teach these Communist lies.
I must confess a family tragedy, Annabelle came back to public school Thursday evening and converted to Judaism. She converted because she noticed one of her so-called “friends” at lunch-hour eat a Jew food known as “Lox”. Annabelle had one bite of the “Lox”, and her religion that I worked so hard to spread the good Gospel of Jesus, just left me like that. I’m still disgusted to my core that my daughter is Jewish, and it’s not fair. I told her I will not drive her to their services because services to the Lord are reserved for Sundays, and she tells me that I can’t drive her to “Synagogue” because their “God” says they are not permitted to work on the day of rest and driving is seen as working. What sort of convoluted and bureaucratic faith is that? Why does this Judaism have that many strict and specific rules? What sort of God do these Jews pray to, Buddha? Abraham? Genghis Khan? They clearly need Jesus to simplify their views on life. With Jesus, it’s like one CAPTCHA away from being admitted into Heaven. The only password you need is God.
Yet my daughter prefers the “Lox” and “Saturday Services with acoustic guitars” over the good Lord and Sunday Bible stories. This would never have been possible if it weren’t for our corrupt Education system being swamped from the Hussein Obama education abomination creating these “Common Core” principles. What is “common” for “Obama” is abnormal, irregular, and absolute BLASPHEMY that has not been purged from our government system. But it does not remove my faith in our sacred country. America is still #1 in everything important about being a free American in the world.
Pastor John Mathewson is Bullshit News’s go-to Pastor and Religion Correspondent. He accepts people from every denomination and religion into his church, including druids, excluding polytheists.