The Environment Is Just Fine; Stop Worrying About It

Written by Roger Goodmen

It’s no secret that “Al Gore” wants to promote the Big Science industry in promoting his Global Warming myth. Big Science has been more active than ever promoting the myths of Global Warming by extensively observing the environment and discovering the shocking fact that it changes over time. Scientists desperate for cash will do anything to make America pay attention to their baseless conspiracy theories. The environment is fine, and we’re not doing enough to take better use of it.

Consider “fracking”, or hydraulic fracturing for short. Fracking is a natural process of the environment by which the ground ejects oil for human consumption in a process called “photosynthesis”. Big Science will say that fracking is horrible for the environment, which is already being decimated by the “Global Warmings” and the “Climate Changes”, while also saying that our money is best used to conserve the environment rather than letting the invisible hand of capitalism regulate the planet as God intended. These scientists claim they want to make the planet “safer for our children”, but pay no attention to their creed, they merely want more money from their lobbyists and from the greatest hoaxer of all time, “Al Gore”. It is a liberal agenda to dismantle our country’s long and prideful history of oil reserves, and getting rid of oil and energy industry permanently is their goal.

But there are no studies that conclude that “fracking” is harmful. And in more ways than one, fracking helps stimulate the job sector and allows America to be less dependent on Godless Islamic Heathens and their only source of income. Fracking helps the terrorists lose, and that is a better case for “fracking” to remain legal then listening to Big Science and their political agenda to take over the United States with their anti-Trump agenda. Why else would elitist scientists hate America gaining more money, and for the American people to have jobs? Scientists live in their own bubble and mess with chemicals for a living in an enclosed lab, away from the rest of humanity. They should not have a say in what goes on in our lives. They should stick to writing long papers about subjects only other scientists care about, which clearly is not economics, or putting the American people in their hearts.

Many of you are also aware of the Coal industry, and Donald Trump’s best efforts to restore a long-lost traditional American job sector that the Obama Regime tried to kill permanently. Coal is a cheap and powerful form of energy that ensures that our trains run on time and remain in operation. Barack Obama falsely concluded that coal was harmful “for our environment” (there goes that rhetorical device of his again) and that we had “better, greener solutions” for our energy. This is just one method of Big Science implementing their liberal agenda haplessly on the American public, trying to make millions of Americans lose their jobs so they can go play with Play-Dohs and the un-American brick toy Lego “to better help the environment”. What are these “green jobs” scientists claim exist, and if they are so effective and money-making for our economy, why haven’t they completely phased out coal for them? The answer is simple: coal is much more effective than a bunch of wind turbines moving the air that generates little for our budget.

Big Science will use big words and insufferably long explanations to try to convert you to being a liberal. They will coerce you into thinking that their method is more reliable “for our lives” than the invisible hand of capitalism. Scientist thinking is allowing children to engage in intercourse with other children in order to “better preserve our environment” (for liberal voters). This is what they call their “hypothesis”. If scientists really know what’s best for the world, they would be economists helping solve our looming national debt crisis. Thankfully, President Trump is aware of all this scientist bunk and is a president that actually cares about our economy and those formerly lost coal jobs Trump has brought back. Unlike scientists, Donald Trump has actually operated and owned many businesses of varying economic sectors and is more aware of the economy than any Al Gore-truther ever could.

When it comes to settling down and having a lifelong job, who would you rather trust, a group of white-coated glasses-wearing nerdy elitist Scientists? Or the President of the United States who knows what’s best for the American people who voted him into office? With economics factored in, there’s no need to worry about the environment, it’s doing fine. Hell, the environment is phenomenal and really doesn’t deserve any more attention then it needlessly gets from The Weather Channel. Liberals should not follow the creed of Colin Kaepernick and should find a job instead. I hear the coal industry is hiring!

Roger Goodmen is an intern for Bullshitnews.org. He is a Senior at George Mason University double majoring in Political Science and Economics. Roger is a person of color and is not afraid of living in liberal reality with his hardcore anti-establishment conservative bully pulpit. He currently lives in an apartment near GMU with his feline-of-color cat named Carlos.