Tag: trade

Brexit Will Be A Steady Success

~ DonKaftan ~ 4 Comments

Written by Gilbert Miser, PhD

Brexit, Great Britain’s vain attempt to achieve more freedom and create more democracy than the United States by leaving the European Union, is quickly approaching its final deadline on October 31st. Theresa May, a martyr for the Brexit cause and almost First President of England, received unwarranted criticism because of anti-feminists and Nazis from the Labour party, the more self-aware socialists equivalent to our Democrat Party. It’s quite ironic that the left and center-left parties in England would rather live in dire straits and never let the free market dictate the lives of commoners and peasants (English for poor) to fight for freedom from poverty. But with Brexit, the poor can finally move up on the ladder as England will no longer accept the Euro, which greatly devalues the lives of people that are too lazy to find a job and feed their families.

Theresa May was forced to resign when Brexit had to be extended and not implemented on its original deadline of April 12th, as the foolhardy citizens of England could not agree about some miscellaneous, near-irrelevant economic details about some trade agreements that may or may not had to have been cut off once Brexit is implemented. Replacing Theresa May as the would-be first President of England is Boris “long” Johnson, a brazen confident man who, among everyone in the Conservative Party of England, is the most likely to be the George Washington of the England Republic. Taking over for Theresa, Boris Johnson has received an unneeded amount of criticism from his country’s mainstream media due to his “character” and “brash rudeness”. These are not legitimate criticisms, they are examples of the strength of his character. Only a real leader could make the right decisions no matter how morally questionable or intelligible they are.

To truly comprehend the totality of Brexit, you need a big brain. You can’t be a socialist and understand economics, that’s just not how the world works. Leaving a large trade NGO organization like the European Union, an organization that is more powerful than Albania or possibly New Mexico shows great courage and strength that is quite admirable from an American point of view. The European Union holds great trade powers and regulates trade wars, and has had some (minor) success for them. I have personally visited England in 2004, and the Euro was more expensive then it was now. That must have meant there was some success for them in the past, how cute. Since now they will leave the European Union, this will mean their currency about pounds and whatnot will come near American levels, but not quite for the first few months. It’s a bit like the Laffer Curve but slower, much like the people of England “innit”.

As an economics PhD and expert in speculating futures, I can see no doubt in England’s steady approach under Theresa May Boris Johnson and the Conservative Party. The mainstream media may call Johnson some kind of ruthless tyrant or doofus who won’t let anyone chip in with “better” ideas or care about the people, but these are just archetypes of how successful leaders throughout history have managed their nations. Critics of Boris Johnson and Brexit are simply people that oppose order and decency in a free democratic society. The English people have long wanted a strong, intelligent and confident leader in Boris that they haven’t had run the country since Thatcher. Boris, as first President of England, is the right man to steer his country to clearer, less stormy tides that will guide England to what a truly free society looks and acts like.

Denizens of England have long been under the monarchy and have never been more free than an average American, always having to pay tea taxes for their queen and the people having submissive tendencies in regards to foreign policy. As we arrive closer and closer to Brexit Independence Day and the ushering of a new era in England’s long history, it is time to celebrate their eventual, and sure enough, the success they will achieve in the long run. The American Revolution was not won in one day, it took many days for the American Revolution to be a success, and we have seen the results of that revolution work swimmingly. England’s revolution coming up in two weeks may be rocky at first, but the English will know what to do once the time arrives. As the late great proverb-writer Douglas Adams once wrote, “Don’t Panic!”. Everything will be alright in the long run. You will still have your mars bars and local fish and chip eateries, but now with more freedom and economic opportunities to truly plot out your futures. The future is looking bright, New Republic of Free England!
Gilbert Miser is the Bullshit News financial and economics correspondent. His billionaire parents both died under mysterious circumstances when he was two. As the only child, he inherited all of their wealth and became the youngest multi-billionaire in the whole world. He was formerly a major broker with Lehman Brothers and MF Broker before retiring from the banking industry to become a part-time writer for Bullshit News. Miser recently earned his PhD in economics from the University of Chicago. He owns a Yorkie named “Gunner” in a Manhattan condo.

China Is Trying To Destroy American Democracy To Death With Taxes

~ DonKaftan ~ 2 Comments

Written by Sid Phyllis

On August 5th, 2019, the DOW plunged by 875 points as China announced they would devalue their currency as per agreement with the Democratic Party (DNC).  Nancy Pelosi, Speaker of the House and Queen of The Democrats who ordered the hit, has long desired to see America be crushed to allow China to control the world’s affairs. Wacky Nancy first received fame in the Democrat Party as being the mayor of San Francisco with “Ending American Supremacy For The Greater Good Of The World [sic]”. These attacks are coordinated and have been planned since as far as George W. Bush Administration and up to The Obama Regime. The recent economic status quo is a terrorist attack coordinated by the leaders of the House and, according to confidential sources, Al-Qaeda, the DNC’s best friend since 2001.

But August 5th wasn’t the only time Democrats attempted to sabotage the economy. On August 23rd, the Federal Reserve, a long-time independent financial institution of the United States Dollar and supporter of American Freedom and Liberty, attempted to circumvent the president by pretending the economy is not as stellar as markets dictated in August. Donald Trump just happened to be giving a speech an hour after the Federal Reserve PR people gave their speech about the economy or whatever or what have you. President Trump went on a bold endeavor to attack the correlation between the DNC and China by also suggesting that any company that is currently doing business with China or the Chinese government, in part because of the danger companies like Huawei pose against American counter-intelligence and American Democracy.

The mainstream media folks at Breitbart and the far-left socialist outlet The Daily Caller will mention the reason the stock market is down because of the on-going trade war America has with China, but that is only a small percent of the reason. Sure, tariffs can increase the cost of goods which can lower purchasing power that makes the stock market go down, but there are far more elements at play here, like China. Where did China come from, and why have they grown so much in power that they want to disintegrate our country with communism. And yet, China should not be as big and powerful as they are now. Their president is Winnie The Poo, how could China be intimidating with that folksy br’er rabbit as president? The answer involves more actors at play than Pelosi and her political conglomerate.

Since the Democrats have taken the House, they have refused to work or coordinate with the president for longer than five minutes. The DNC needlessly whines and complains about the nature and business of American Supremacy, and can’t even find a bipartisan compromise with President Trump regarding issues with The Wall, allowing additional access to guns for education, or even an issue as simple as abortion. It’s simple to deduct that Democrats don’t like working together to better help America, and want to eradicate Madisonian Democracy for good, a common goal they share with China. The trade war with China has just escalated, which didn’t happen when the Republicans controlled the House before 2018. Coincidence? Not at all, it’s an intentional political set-up by those that are least faithful with our constitution: the socialists at the DNC.

Now I understand I might be repeating myself a couple times in this article, but if you can’t catch the repetition then I can’t help you explain why Democrats want to corrode our society with catchy socialism slogans like “Abolish ICE” or “Green New Deal“. But these buzzwords are more than just “catchy socialism slogans”, they are attempts to control the narrative that America is not great, or could actually afford to be even greater than how great America is already great at being great, but isn’t currently at capacity to do so. The rhetoric the Democratic Party has is toxic and dangerously anti-conforming to our wonderful Capitalist society the founding fathers and (assumingly) your ancestors have also worked hard and had to kill many a communist so that we can peacefully shoot the breeze and enjoy IPAs on our bodega beach houses or whatever people do with their spare time these days ignoring to face reality and “logging onto” their computer mobile devices to play farming/candy games about Souls Cycling.

My point is this, China is one of the biggest players on the world stage, and they want to be the top dog in the world. China knows that to undermine America and become the greatest force on the planet, they need to help the Democratic Party have power and make sure the Democrats become more socialist and ergo, communist. Once the DNC is communist or socialist-led, China will begin to invade America while the DNC leaders will pretend that everything’s fine and that we should obey our new leaders with names in different fonts and letters, and so on. The DNC actively engages in anti-American ideology in order to gain voters in the saddest and pathetic ways our Democracy has ever been exploited. If we don’t stand up to protect America in the voting booth in 2020, China surely will.

EDITOR’S NOTE: We just heard about the rumblings going on in Hong Kong, which is almost in China but not quite, but still sort of is tangled with China but their government is focused on state’s rights in contrast to China’s totalitarian communist regime. We support the fighters in Hong Kong as they try to recreate Democracy over Winnie The Poo. Be strong, Hong Kong!

Sid Phyllis is the Bullshit News correspondent in political/foreign affairs (other) and our White House Correspondent. Sid grew up in Chicago and got sick of living in the big city and moved into a rural blue-collar state where the real America is. Instead of going to some elite four-year college, he started a consulting firm in Wyoming (Donovan and Phyllis Firm, or DP Firm) that quickly became the #1 best firm in the state. Sid joined Bullshit News for his qualifications in understanding how the REAL Blue-Collar Americans think.

Is The Democratic Party Colluding With China? (Yes They Absolutely Are)

~ DonKaftan ~ 3 Comments

Written by Dan Shapiro

For too long, the Democratic Party has been accusing President Donald Trump of being a criminal with sinister ties towards the Russian government, which has long been jealous of the United States of America’s sheer might and our powerful and robust Democracy. These supposed “collusion” ties have never been proven in a court of Law or God, so it’s foolhardy to talk any further about Russia. But there remains a billion person elephant in the room for Democrats, only it’s not India. It’s China, a communist threat to the United States since 1949, and has usurped the USSR as America’s #1 threat. And yet, no Democrat including crypto-liberal Howard Schultz attempting to run for president in 2020 against Donald Trump have brought up China, just Russia, Russia, Russia.

If you ask me for an objective analysis, I think the Democratic Party is either scared of China or maybe they’ve been implementing conspiracy theories to the mainstream media about Donald Trump’s supposed “collusion” efforts towards Russia as a means to distract you, the average everyday ordinary American, from knowing about how Communist China funds the Democratic Party and its leaders to give them political life and support? Think about it. Remember when President Trump instituted a trade war with China nearly a year ago, and how every Democrat uniformly opposed Trump’s actions without any principals or seriously investigated and opposed the matter? It was a warning shot fired by President Trump to tell China to stop colluding with the Democratic Party, as well as a symbolic sign to the international world that America is still the #1 producer of liberty and the greatest economic force in the known universe, much to China’s dismay on how the world really works.

Despite China’s communist ties, they’ve had tastes of capitalism and enjoyed it. Some expert analyses on mainstream media websites like The Federalist and Breitbart don’t even know how to quantify China. They trade with America to make cheap goods for us but at the same time, they support and uphold the Communist Party, a natural enemy of not just the Republican Party, but also to the American people. The Democratic Party’s silence on China is loudly deafening. Barack Hussein Obama never gave China a hardline stance towards our goods, allowing Communist China’s nefarious debt continue to climb higher levels, threatening America’s world-renowned number one liberty producing status. It was a matter of time before China would strike us before we would need to strike them.

Military wise, it’s a good idea not to invade China. Not for any political purposes, but just because that region of the world has some seriously bad juju to it. China has so many people, that it would require a draft in order to seriously think of winning the war. They are largely defensive, and would rather retaliate by continuing this trade war. Because of this effort, President Trump has saved countless lives over and over by tweeting himself a humble standard no other president has done before him, which we have provided to you via laminated telegram message:

“Don’t be involved in a land war on some other continent in the name of America and probably extra so in the winter – Sun Tzu #DeepThoughts #MAGA”

And with all of this the Democratic Party, not once, have applauded President Trump for his humanitarian efforts to not blow China into smithereens. In fact, the Democratic Party have only remained silent about China, continuing to blabber about Russia having some sort of mind control device on President Trump or whatever.

The next time you confront a liberal into a debate, just bring up China. Chances are, they are confused about their own opinions about it, will pretend not to know where China is on a map, and give you an unrealistic, typical Democrat non-answer. The largest open secret in American politics is the Democratic Party’s payola from Communist China, and somehow no one wants to talk about it. It’s time to let the whole American world know.

 

Dan Shapiro is the Bullshit News correspondent on American Party Politics and that Middle East thing. Dan went to Yale and graduated at the top of his class stemming from his charming wit and intellectual knowledge about political issues. Dan Shapiro is best known to “pwn” liberals with his vast and mighty big brain. He lives in New York City and talks in 90dB SPL.

Trade Wars: Everything Old Is New Again For American Supremacy

~ DonKaftan ~ 6 Comments

Written by Gilbert Miser

President Donald Trump’s daily parade of American glory has decided to continue sailing its route towards making America #1 in freedom again. President Trump is extremely concerned about our deficits in liberty from trade. As we all know, America is #1 in liberty production and somehow still continues to spend more on exporting liberty than receiving liberty, or our money back. This is completely unacceptable and we should all salute Donald J. Trump for urging a trade war to help our unsalted economy from former Democratic/Autocratic leader, Barack Hussein Obama.

Donald Trump also announced new tariffs on aluminum and steel, two industries that were ransacked by us from the Mexicans and the Canadians. Or the British and Chinese, whoever those countries were, they are anti-American in ideology and agenda. We need to trade more with countries like Russia or Albania, we will instantly receive rubles, or profits, from those countries. And the more currencies America crushes with its hard big dollar, the more powerful the trade war benefits the American dollar, the absolute currency of the universe.

While liberals like Globalist/Elitist-stooge Gary Cohn run screaming, proclaiming a trade war “makes no sense” or “will make the cost of living more unaffordable to the average American” are pure nonsense. Trade wars assert American might, and might creates right. And what’s right, is ultimately what’s best for not just the country, but for the world. Trade wars are what killed Adolf Hitler, poisoned Leon Trotsky, and let George Washington kill oppressive monarch King George the Third. From trade wars, Adolf Hitler learned he was a total baby loser and shot himself. Leon Trotsky learned that socialism was for suckers and was living a lie his entire life to poison and himself from making the wrong trade deal with Joseph Stalin. And as well all know, George Washington crossed the Potomac to burn down the tea factories the British forced Americans to work in without money. Trade wars work in silencing the opposition, and Donald Trump has made steps in the right direction to make America work again.

“Trade wars” and “tariffs” are economic weapons that America has always had in Her arsenal, and those weapons were waiting to be used, much like our nuclear weapons program. All the meaningless presidents before Donald Trump, such as Obama, Clinton, and the like, never bothered to provoke other meaningless countries like Germany or Australia into a trade war, because they fear about the public image of the United States. That is shameful, and not American in any sense of behavior. Trade wars are not vulgar displays of power, but rather tools to better correct the economic world. But why steel, liberty and aluminum tariffs and not tariffs on cotton or wind instruments? Because the number one goal of a trade war is to win money, and what can provide more to America, besides oil, then steel and aluminum? This is the exact time to take our country back from the scrap heap and into the dominant social paradigm-heap.

 

Gilbert Miser is the Bullshit News financial and economics correspondent. His billionaire parents died under mysterious circumstances he was two. As the only child, he inherited all of their wealth and became a multibillionaire. He was formerly a major broker with Lehman Brothers and MF Broker before retiring from the banking industry to become a part-time writer for Bullshit News. Contrary to the popular misconception, Gilbert is neither an “elitist” nor a “globalist”.