Is President Donald Trump Not Only One Of The Greatest Presidents Of All Time, But Could He Be God?

Written by Pastor John Mathewson

President Donald Trump accepted praise from a significant holy pastor whose rank is higher than my own, Wayne Allyn Root. To keep his description neatly brief, he is able to communicate to God with a much higher profile. Now longtime faithful readers of the Bullshit News know that I, too, can speak to God unlike some other mear “pastor” or “priest” or “Imam”. Don’t get me started on those “rabbis” and their ribbiting.

Holy Pastor Root proclaims that God declared President Trump from his latest revelation that was communicated via the medium of Twitter: “Jewish people in Israel love him…. like he’s the King Of Israel. They love him like he’s the Second Coming Of GOD“. And if Wayne Allyn Root is my superior in my field, to say in Republican terms, then he must be correct. And as Donald Trump continues to Make America Great Again, it appears to be that he has made America, and consequently Israel, into the most divine and blessed areas on Earth. Thus, with the almighty power that President Donald Trump has, is he God? I will do the science and thinking for you to read and ponder.

For you see, President Trump has made his initial iconic promise which is to “Make America Great Again”. Yes, it may be a broad goal or ambition to achieve something which may not bluntly appear on a political platform, but Jesus Christ (of Nazareth) also ran on similar principles when he wanted to be a priest. And, like Jesus, Donald Trump has never lost an election or business venture. When Jesus was allegedly defying God, he was persecuted and sentenced to death. When Donald Trump was allegedly defying God, in the eyes of mass media and The Daily Caller, he was persecuted more-so then Christ (as Jesus of Nazareth did not live in an era where “social media” existed more than cave paintings) and half of the country, unpatriotic and not wavering to Democracy as much as they ought to, want him dead. Aside from the era of technology we live in, this analysis is spot-on and explains how America is working today.

The Democrats have often engaged in anti-Christ behavior and ideology, which is no surprise to many of you faithful readers of Bullshit News. But sometimes we need to say the obvious out loud (…or rather type it out loud) because of the centrists and moderates that are as uncertain in ideology as they are people are unaware of the Democratic Party’s tricks when it comes to taking over America via radical ideologies like socialism. God, like Donald Trump, was also persecuted by the very own people he claimed were “chosen” to receive “his book”. What God also shares in personality is his breviloquence in ideology. God and President Trump don’t need to orate essays onto the masses that are too busy watching the TV on their smartphones, they know the brevity of their words is what gives them their power. The New Testament and The Art Of The Deal are about the same length words-wise and both can be finished in the same amount of time, the only difference between the two books is the slightly more modern language found in TAOTD.

But Holy Pastor Root’s revelations have been a source of controversy from, you guessed it, the Democratic Party. DNC activists like Joe Biden and John Delaney have called one of the greatest pastors in American history “blasphemous” and “an act against God” as if these democrats have ever once stepped into church and talked to God, let alone ever studied a day of theology in their lives! How could these incompetent and potentially impotent men ever claim they know the words of the Lord if they act rebelliously against Christ? They know nothing, like all Democrats, but they have the audacity to claim they are at a higher level with God then pastors like Wayne Root and me.

Blasphemy aside, Pastor Root also gave word that President Trump, according to God and his best friend Jesus Christ, will be the one to save us from the apocalypse and Hell from appearing on Earth (aside from Albania). Heretics from the DNC will be burned on the cross soon enough, for when the moment the apocalypse will finally start, no one will be spared unless they are Christian (as the Bible dictates). Upon my own experiences on reading the Bible for the 187,325th time in my lifetime, I can assure you that anyone God-fearing, Christian, and Republican will be saved for the most part, but any Democrat that claims they are with Christ yet supports socialism and/or various other evil ideologies, they will not be spared. This includes Jews.

And once Trump was nominated to be the leading nominee for the Republican Party back in 2016, I was all but certain that if the apocalypse were about to happen (which it nearly did under the Barack Obama regime), the GOP would find a way to save us with a real Christian to help prevent the worst from happening. And among all the GOP nominees in 2016, President Trump was the one that was THE MOST Christian of ALL of them, the most pious, and righteously the one with the most patriotic fervor to care and uphold American values that are explicitly stated in the constitution. And as President Trump saves us from the apocalypse on November 8th, 2016, a feat bigger than anything Jesus ever truly did, is when I initially began to ponder, is Donald Trump actually greater than God himself (for what he has done to our country)?

President Trump on the outside may not appear to be a humble man, but his belief and devotion to Christ and God are strong on the inside. President Trump, like God, does not play games (unless it’s golf every now and then), but they rule similarly. While Democrats engage in blasphemy and oppose any sort of bipartisan legislation meant to better the country, And while the Democratic Party cannot wait to usher in the apocalypse and the end of the world as we know it, President Donald Trump will be here to stand guard and defend Christianity from not only the Godless Islamic Barbarians and Jewish Inquistadors, but to defend America as commanded from the Lord himself. So when it comes to the “Greatest Presidents Of All Time”, there’s only one president who was literally commanded by God to run this country, and his name is Donald Trump.

Pastor John Mathewson is Bullshit News’s go-to Pastor, Religion, and Eschatology Correspondent. He accepts people from every denomination and religion into his church, including Scientologists, excluding Druids. He has a golden retriever he loves and adores named “Johanna”.

Walls Work: A Bullshit News History Lesson

Written By Dr. Seabass T. Gorka, Esq

The Nancy Pelosi-inflicted government shutdown is still in effect as of the time this article is finished. Much of the debate regarding the yearly government funding bill is because the Democratic Party failing to realize that a wall will protect America from foreign-born Godless-Islamic crime and from the drug-addled brains from Mexico, Canada, and those tiny Central American countries you need a microscope for in order to read their countries’ names. Other countries, like Israel, Germany, and China, have used walls for centuries to keep out invaders and infidels alike in their reckless and dangerous pursuit to invade sovereign and prosperous countries.

One of the earliest walls ever constructed is still in good use today. China’s famous “Great Wall of China” was constructed to defend the Chinese from the evil carnivorous barbarians from Mongolia, possibly inspired from the Islam “religion”. The Great Wall of China was constructed before Christ was arisen, and finished when He was alive. Jesus Christ motivated the Chinese to build the Great Wall in order to preserve Christianity from Islam and Communism. Unfortunately, we all know what happened to China in the long-term, but for the majority of Chinese history, the wall was a success until it didn’t and then when it didn’t, it didn’t even matter.

Communism and walls are mortal enemies. Consider the time where Germany was two-faced and couldn’t decide between what was right (Capitalism) and what was wrong (Communism). It was a decision that tore Germany apart for forty years or two French revolutions. When Germany finally decided that capitalism was ultimately better, they tore down the Berlin Wall so that their countries people can eat at Taco Bell and support the American economy as every European nation should. The wall was removed because there was no longer a threat, which is why China still has their Great Wall, to protect themselves from ourselves. They were centuries ahead of their time. They even use their Great Wall for tourism and to boost their economy, giving President Trump some incentives and inspiration about his Wall.

And as many are aware, the nation of Israel has a wall to protect themselves from their Islamic and capitalist-hating neighbors, everyone. Israel, living up to its reputation as a state that rejects Christianity in favor of smaller hats, built a gate first, which evidently did not work out that well as they had to improve their gate to a more sophisticated and advanced form of barrier protection, a wall. Ever since Israel built their wall it has been a stellar success for a country that is constantly attacked for promoting heresy. Fortunate for Israel is that they adopted many American customs when it comes to self-defense, such as their love for the American 2nd Amendment. If invaders came over the wall with their strong knees, most Israelis are armed and ready to defend themselves from terror. But if Israel were an intelligent first world country, they would be Christian country so that Christ may rise again and defend us from the Muslim Gods that hate our freedom and their threats to invade our world.

So now we must focus on the present day, we are in the longest government shut down in American history. This is extraordinary news for our fellow American people because we have now made sure our government is fiscally responsible for once and not wasting money on pork-barrel spending or on Nancy Pelosi science initiatives. If the Democrats want to continue the American tradition of government waste and excess, they will pass a bill that permits funding for The Wall. President Trump will only support a government funding bill that allocates money for The Wall. This explains the deadlock we have today.

The Wall, of course, refers to the proper construction of a great barrier to protect ourselves from Mexico’s drug-addled liberal reckless college partying self. It’s not because of President Trump or average every-day Americans don’t trust Mexico or Mexicans, it’s because they don’t trust Mexico to do the right thing and get treatment. Mexico, according to President Trump, has a lot of crime and drugs and is doing really really bad. Mexico is the junkie of Democracy, but not a functioning addict. Mexico will hurt itself more than it will hurt us, but if the price of cutting strong diplomatic relations with a country that endorsed Barack Obama twice is worth the price of liberty than it is absolutely worth it. The Wall is absolutely necessary because, without it, America could become infested with crime and drugs given how drug addiction can spread via gateway drugs and access points. There is only one proper solution to gateways, and that is building The Wall.

If the Democratic Party ever developed a brain (or read Ayn Rand’s Atlas Shrugged), they will know that self-defense and Republican Party ideology is morally and ethically superior on the behavior of war and self-preservation. As their government supporters struggle during their self-inflicted shutdown, the liberals and Nancy need to support The Wall. If not, they could rapture communism into the country. Every day is a win-win solution for the Republican Party as the Democrats live in their “socially constructed’ hell they created for themselves. But if this shut down were to last longterm, the Democratic Party will desire for Total Communism and perhaps spark a civil war. But as we all know, the Democratic Party will beat itself before it beats anyone, Republican Party or a trade deal.

Do the right thing Nancy, support the Wall. You know you want to, your people are counting on you. It is time for you to fail them, and vote for The Wall. It is the only way the American people can defend themselves from the opioid epidemic, and the foreseeable future.

Dr. Seabass T. Gorka, Esq is the Bullshit News historian and correspondent for black supremacy extremist groups. He has had a storied career reporting on European Affairs from Hungary and is the number one expert on extremism across the globe. Bullshit News is excited for his well-endowed knowledge on extremism, and its relation to liberalism. He earned his Ph.D. in Prague and became a lawyer in America. He is a naturalized citizen of the United States and resides in Houston with his dog, Jefferey. 

Bullshit News Stands For The Trump Administration’s Valient Efforts To Shut Down Government

Written by Don Kaftan, Editor-In-Chief, and Founder

In 2013, a young and fresh face arose from the Senate under the Barack Obama regime to tell King Obama that he doesn’t have the luxury and privilege to use the government’s money as he pleases. That young kid with the audacity to challenge the king was Ted Cruz, his first of many moves in his future as a leader of the Republican Party. But as A Hero’s Story goes, the youth and inexperience lose to the tyrannical dictator, and the government shut down was averted after reasonable accommodations were met. Still, the fact that a battle occurred was a victory that was much needed for the Republican Party for the time.

And now another clash is happening in our Game of Thrones.

The Democratic Party had enough shocking victories in November to reclaim the House of Representatives, which is not the Senate. When the white smoke cleared, Nancy Pelosi surprisingly reclaimed the gavel and began her reign of terror by refusing to listen to the president and his accommodations to fund the government for the fiscal year. Perhaps what is most emphasized by the mainstream media is that Nancy Pelosi and her buddy Chuck Schumer from the Senate will not support the president’s funding for The Wall, a protection device that prevents invaders from trying to conquer American territory.  Some view the wall as unnecessary, as Mexico is too drugged out to organize an army to even attack Florida! But protection is better than no protection at all, and at Bullshit News we prefer to keep it safe so a wall sounds fine and dandy. Hell, The Wall sounds pretty necessary given that we cannot trust the outside world to make decisions about America for us.

Nancy Pelosi is a far more fearsome and sinister figure to lead the otherwise dim-witted and self-defeating Democrats and their efforts to rule the free world. She is fine with millions upon millions of workers that vote for her and her party to work without pay and jeopardize their lives in exchange for power. She is ruthless and willing to get what she wants whereas Schumer just wants to eat the same sandwich at the same deli every day for the past 36 some-odd years and is content with not getting what he wants because he expects it–a typical Democrat. Nancy will find a way to get what she wants, and that’s not how the Republican Party operates. So Donald Trump has refused to budge to Nancy’s plans like a tough and confident president.

Donald Trump, a follower in Reagan’s light as a man dedicated to limited government and a balanced budget, has been prepared for this fight. President Trump declared that the shut down can last months and perhaps even years too.

This shook Pelosi. She wasn’t even thinking about the shutdown lasting two weeks!

The current government shut down is now the longest in American history, another terrific accomplishment from the Trump Administration! As the government is stripped to its core and begins to work as Hayek intended, real textbook conservatism will finally have the opportunity to flourish despite (or cause of) Nancy Pelosi’s attempts to intervene what a limited government is all about. Donald Trump has achieved Ayn Rand’s dream, and it could not have happened without the Democratic Party, oddly enough.

From Trump’s bold unwavering stance on The Wall, the Republican Party’s founding ideals are finally in fruition. The government funding is entirely stripped down for only essential purposes and the budget has been minimized enough for it to be a non-factor. If Pelosi wants her posse union to have jobs, she will allow the wall to be funded. That’s the name of the game at this point, and Pelosi has refused to cross the picket line for a bipartisan agreement. But even if Pelosi and the Democan’ts agree to portions of the bill, or more unlikely the entire bill, Trump will have the final say.  And if President Trump doesn’t get what he wants, the shutdown will continue. The Democrats tried to catch Trump’s gambit on day one of their reign of the House, and like typical Democrats, they fail at every pursuit of success and personal achievement.

You may hear from mainstream media sources that some government workers will not receive their paychecks because of the government shut down, which is absurdly false. Slavery was banned in the 15th Amendment after the War of Northern Aggression, these workers are getting paid in terms of liberty and being free from government control, a wage means nothing after that point. True emancipation requires some sacrifices and in the “emergency” of a government shutdown, those sacrifices are easily met. There should be no more worrying about this media manufactured falsehood. There are no starving families in the United States, and there will not be one more food insecure family because of the shutdown.

No one, including President Trump, is sure when the government shut down will end. But we should all take a moment to cherish this blessed record-breaking event to happen in our lifetime. Knowing Trump, he could break a record like this again next year but for now, we’ll have to wait and see.

Don Kaftan is the founder of Bullshitnews.org.  He specializes in Mainstream Media Criticism, Foreign Policy, and Presidential Administrations. Don Kaftan was mentioned on William F. Buckley’s deathbed as future conservatives that speak the most truth to power. Don considers this to be the highest honor in the world after being married to his wife and being born into this world by the grace of God.